{"product_id":"blonde","title":"Shiny Brass","description":"\u003cp data-path-to-node=\"4\"\u003eLook, we get it. You spent years drinking battery acid filtered through a dirty sock in a plywood shack, but your palate doesn't have to stay in the Stone Age. Just because you have a \"Low Regard for Self\" ribbon doesn't mean you have to drink charred dirt.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-path-to-node=\"5\"\u003e\u003cb data-path-to-node=\"5\" data-index-in-node=\"0\"\u003eSHINY BRASS\u003c\/b\u003e is our high-velocity, low-drag blonde roast specifically engineered for the vet who wants their caffeine to hit like a flashbang but taste like a victory cigar. We’ve sourced these beans from Central America and Africa—basically the only two places with more humidity and chaos than a Baghdad summer.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-path-to-node=\"6\"\u003e\u003cb data-path-to-node=\"6\" data-index-in-node=\"0\"\u003eThe Profile:\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul data-path-to-node=\"7\"\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp data-path-to-node=\"7,0,0\"\u003e\u003cb data-path-to-node=\"7,0,0\" data-index-in-node=\"0\"\u003eThe Feel:\u003c\/b\u003e This isn't your First Sergeant’s \"Burnt Motor Oil\" special. It’s light, bright, and surprisingly sweet—kind of like that one PFC who actually believes the recruiter’s promises.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp data-path-to-node=\"7,1,0\"\u003e\u003cb data-path-to-node=\"7,1,0\" data-index-in-node=\"0\"\u003eThe Taste:\u003c\/b\u003e Expect notes of \u003cb data-path-to-node=\"7,1,0\" data-index-in-node=\"27\"\u003ebrown sugar, citrus, and a hint of \"I’m not signing that counseling statement.\"\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp data-path-to-node=\"7,2,0\"\u003e\u003cb data-path-to-node=\"7,2,0\" data-index-in-node=\"0\"\u003eThe Mission:\u003c\/b\u003e This blend is optimized for \u003cb data-path-to-node=\"7,2,0\" data-index-in-node=\"41\"\u003eSweet Espresso\u003c\/b\u003e. It pulls shots so smooth you’ll forget your knees click every time you stand up.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp data-path-to-node=\"8\"\u003e\u003cb data-path-to-node=\"8\" data-index-in-node=\"0\"\u003eWarning:\u003c\/b\u003e Drinking this may cause you to actually enjoy your morning, engage in unauthorized morale, and speak to civilians without using profanity. Results may vary.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cblockquote data-path-to-node=\"9\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-path-to-node=\"9,0\"\u003e\u003ci data-path-to-node=\"9,0\" data-index-in-node=\"0\"\u003e\"It’s the only thing in the civilian world that’s actually 'Light and Fast' without being a total lie.\"\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/blockquote\u003e","brand":"OIF Vet Coffee Compnay","offers":[{"title":"Coarse \/ 12oz","offer_id":52320192069911,"sku":"TVARBLONDE-CO-NA-12OZ","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Coarse \/ 1 LB","offer_id":52320192102679,"sku":"TVARBLONDE-CO-NA-1LB","price":28.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Coarse \/ 2 LB","offer_id":52320192135447,"sku":"TVARBLONDE-CO-NA-2LB","price":49.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Coarse \/ 5 LB","offer_id":52320192168215,"sku":"TVARBLONDE-CO-NA-5LB","price":89.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Coarse \/ 12 LB","offer_id":52320192200983,"sku":"TVARBLONDE-CO-NA-12LB","price":189.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Espresso \/ 12oz","offer_id":52320192233751,"sku":"TVARBLONDE-ES-NA-12OZ","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Espresso \/ 1 LB","offer_id":52320192266519,"sku":"TVARBLONDE-ES-NA-1LB","price":28.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Espresso \/ 2 LB","offer_id":52320192299287,"sku":"TVARBLONDE-ES-NA-2LB","price":49.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Espresso \/ 5 LB","offer_id":52320192332055,"sku":"TVARBLONDE-ES-NA-5LB","price":89.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Standard \/ 12oz","offer_id":52320192364823,"sku":"TVARBLONDE-ST-NA-12OZ","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Standard \/ 1 LB","offer_id":52320192397591,"sku":"TVARBLONDE-ST-NA-1LB","price":28.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Standard \/ 2 LB","offer_id":52320192430359,"sku":"TVARBLONDE-ST-NA-2LB","price":49.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Standard \/ 5 LB","offer_id":52320192463127,"sku":"TVARBLONDE-ST-NA-5LB","price":89.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Whole Bean \/ 12oz","offer_id":52320192495895,"sku":"TVARBLONDE-WH-NA-12OZ","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Whole Bean \/ 1 LB","offer_id":52320192528663,"sku":"TVARBLONDE-WH-NA-1LB","price":28.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Whole Bean \/ 2 LB","offer_id":52320192561431,"sku":"TVARBLONDE-WH-NA-2LB","price":49.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Whole Bean \/ 5 LB","offer_id":52320192594199,"sku":"TVARBLONDE-WH-NA-5LB","price":89.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0989\/6198\/1719\/files\/label3_on_bag_e9a9a0c1-a46f-41b2-91df-bc705d0188a5.jpg?v=1771948704","url":"https:\/\/oifvetcoffee.com\/products\/blonde","provider":"OIF Vet Coffee Compnay","version":"1.0","type":"link"}