{"product_id":"the-mandatory-fun-blend","title":"The \"MANDATORY FUN\" blend","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eRoast Level:\u003c\/strong\u003e Darker than a 1SG’s soul at 0400\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFlavor Profile:\u003c\/strong\u003e Double Chocolate Mocha + Caramel Macchiato\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eListen up, high-speed. We know your knees click like a Geissele trigger and your back has more \"structural integrity\" issues than a Baghdad T-wall, but we’ve got the fuel to get you through the motor pool Monday from hell.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe Mandatory Fun blend is exactly like that battalion change of command ceremony: it’s thick, it’s dark, and there’s a lot of sweet-talking involved to make the pain go away. We took the richest Double Chocolate Mocha we could find—darker than the inside of a Bradley—and hit it with a tactical strike of Buttery Caramel Macchiato.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt’s the only thing that tastes better than a \"mission complete\" radio call. It’s sweet enough to make you forget about your VA claim status, but bold enough to keep you awake during a four-hour safety brief on why you shouldn't drink Rip Its and jump off the barracks roof.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhy You Need This:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003cstrong\u003e* Tactical Sweetness:\u003c\/strong\u003e Covers the taste of sand, CLP, and regret.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e * High Caffeine Yield:\u003c\/strong\u003e Because \"embrace the suck\" is easier when your heart is racing at 180 BPM.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e * Veteran Owned:\u003c\/strong\u003e Roasted by guys who actually know what a porta-john in 120-degree heat smells like (this tastes significantly better).\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"OIF Vet Coffee Compnay","offers":[{"title":"12 Ounce","offer_id":52539491680535,"sku":null,"price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"1 Pound","offer_id":52539491713303,"sku":null,"price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ammo Can (12 K Cups)","offer_id":52539491746071,"sku":null,"price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0989\/6198\/1719\/files\/Gemini_Generated_Image_wueul5wueul5wueu.png?v=1774293042","url":"https:\/\/oifvetcoffee.com\/products\/the-mandatory-fun-blend","provider":"OIF Vet Coffee Compnay","version":"1.0","type":"link"}