{"product_id":"the-piss-tube-special-ammo-can-12-k-cups","title":"THE PISS TUBE SPECIAL AMMO CAN (12 K CUPS)","description":"\u003ch3 data-path-to-node=\"1\"\u003e\u003cb data-path-to-node=\"1\" data-index-in-node=\"0\"\u003eFlavor Profile: Salted Caramel Chocolate Cappuccino\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003chr data-path-to-node=\"2\"\u003e\n\u003ch3 data-path-to-node=\"3\"\u003e\u003cb data-path-to-node=\"3\" data-index-in-node=\"0\"\u003eThe Mission Briefing\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp data-path-to-node=\"4\"\u003eListen up, high-speed. We know your palate hasn’t been the same since you spent fourteen months breathing in burn pit fumes and eating \"Omelet, Vegetable\" MREs. You’ve graduated from lukewarm, oily motor water brewed in a communal pot that hasn’t been scrubbed since the invasion. It’s time to treat your taste buds like they actually belong to a civilized human being—even if your knees still sound like a bowl of Rice Krispies.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-path-to-node=\"5\"\u003e\u003cb data-path-to-node=\"5\" data-index-in-node=\"0\"\u003eThe Piss Tube Special\u003c\/b\u003e is a tactical fusion of salty, sweet, and caffeinated. It’s smoother than a 1SG’s head and hits harder than a surprise UA on a Monday morning. We’ve dialed in the perfect ratio of decadent chocolate and buttery caramel, finished with just enough salt to remind you of the sweat dripping off your nose during a mid-day patrol in Fallujah.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch3 data-path-to-node=\"6\"\u003e\u003cb data-path-to-node=\"6\" data-index-in-node=\"0\"\u003eWhy You Need This Loadout:\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul data-path-to-node=\"7\"\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp data-path-to-node=\"7,0,0\"\u003e\u003cb data-path-to-node=\"7,0,0\" data-index-in-node=\"0\"\u003eThe Ammo Can:\u003c\/b\u003e Forget those flimsy cardboard boxes that tear if you look at them wrong. Our 12-count stash comes in a reinforced \u003cb data-path-to-node=\"7,0,0\" data-index-in-node=\"128\"\u003e\"Ammo Can\"\u003c\/b\u003e box. It’s stackable, packable, and looks better on your counter than your spouse’s \"Live, Laugh, Love\" decor.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp data-path-to-node=\"7,1,0\"\u003e\u003cb data-path-to-node=\"7,1,0\" data-index-in-node=\"0\"\u003eFlavor Discipline:\u003c\/b\u003e A rich, frothy cappuccino base that masks the bitterness of your cynical soul.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp data-path-to-node=\"7,2,0\"\u003e\u003cb data-path-to-node=\"7,2,0\" data-index-in-node=\"0\"\u003eVeteran Owned \u0026amp; Operated:\u003c\/b\u003e Roasted by guys who know that \"0-dark-thirty\" isn't just a movie title—it’s a lifestyle.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp data-path-to-node=\"7,3,0\"\u003e\u003cb data-path-to-node=\"7,3,0\" data-index-in-node=\"0\"\u003eDeployment Ready:\u003c\/b\u003e K-Cup compatible. Just pop it in, hit the button, and enjoy a moment of peace before you have to go deal with \"civilian\" problems.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr data-path-to-node=\"8\"\u003e\n\u003cblockquote data-path-to-node=\"9\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-path-to-node=\"9,0\"\u003e\u003cb data-path-to-node=\"9,0\" data-index-in-node=\"0\"\u003eWARNING:\u003c\/b\u003e Drinking this may cause sudden urges to gate-keep what \"real\" coffee is, an increased desire to wear silkies in public, and the localized ability to land a spot-on impression of your old Platoon Sergeant.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/blockquote\u003e\n\u003cp data-path-to-node=\"10\"\u003e\u003cb data-path-to-node=\"10\" data-index-in-node=\"0\"\u003ePack Size:\u003c\/b\u003e 12 Rounds (Pods) \u003cb data-path-to-node=\"10\" data-index-in-node=\"28\"\u003eCaliber:\u003c\/b\u003e Salted Caramel \/ Chocolate \u003cb data-path-to-node=\"10\" data-index-in-node=\"64\"\u003eIntent:\u003c\/b\u003e Maximum Morning Lethality\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"OIF Vet Coffee Company","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":52608549716247,"sku":null,"price":12.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0989\/6198\/1719\/files\/Gemini_Generated_Image_y8p01y8p01y8p01y.png?v=1775123077","url":"https:\/\/oifvetcoffee.com\/products\/the-piss-tube-special-ammo-can-12-k-cups","provider":"OIF Vet Coffee Compnay","version":"1.0","type":"link"}