B.O.H.I.C.A (IYKYK)

B.O.H.I.C.A. (Bend Over Here It Comes Again) If you know you know

Roast Level: Medium-Dark (Like the tan you got from the burn pits) Profile: Dark Chocolate, Molasses, Brown Sugar

The Sit-Rep

Listen up, because the Command Sergeant Major is already looking for someone to sweep the motor pool and you don't want to be in line of sight.

We’ve all been there. You’re three hours into a twelve-hour guard rotation in the Triangle of Death, the dust is 90% of your lung capacity, and the "Big Chicken Dinner" just handed down a new FRAGO that ruins every plan you had for sleep. That’s when you realize the Green Weenie has struck again.

When life (or the LT with a map) decides to give it to you dry, there’s only one response: B.O.H.I.C.A.

The Flavor Profile

This isn't that watered-down, translucent battery acid from the DFAC. This is a Medium-Dark Roast designed for the veteran who knows that "embrace the suck" is a lifestyle, not just a bumper sticker.

• Dark Chocolate: Bitter and bold, just like your favorite NCO’s sense of humor.

• Molasses: Thick and sweet, sticking to your ribs like the humidity in Baghdad.

• Brown Sugar: A hint of sweetness to help you forget that your knees feel like gravel and your back is held together by spite and VA-approved ibuprofen.

Why You Need This

Whether you’re patrolling the suburbs of Suburbia or just trying to survive a 0900 corporate "synergy" meeting that definitely could have been an email, B.O.H.I.C.A. provides the caffeine-induced situational awareness you need to stay frosty.

Warning: Drinking this may cause sudden urges to check your sectors, hydrate, and yell at people to get off the grass.